Saturday, July 30, 2011

Going to be doing 2 new game Reviews:Soon.

I will soon be reviewing "Dude and Zombies" and "Help The Hero",two games I by the way recommend,and you'll figure out why (hopefully) in a while.

See you then!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Pothead Zombies

For my second web review,I take on Pothead Zombies,a mindless protect the castle type game.The game is very simple,you and your girlfriend/wife/friend they,never really tell,like most things in this game,must fight hordes of zombie hippies,although maybe they're not,and although that would be an interesting concept, I really have this feeling they don't want to make an animatic,except for the 1 in the beginning and the one I suppose would be in the end,but I've never actually finished the game,and you might call that unprofessional,but I suppose I am,because Professionals have the ability to get loyal subscribers and beautiful comments,an ability I apparently don't possess,but hopefully one day I will.

anyway,back to the game at hand,I didn't finish the game because the game up and shut down when I got an achievement for killing 100 zombies.This is very problematic because the game apparently has no save system,this is the thing I just don't understand because save systems are programming 101 and this is a big game,well for an internet game that is.The game is by the way easy,if you want  some Pro Tips the here it is,buy the crossbow.nothing else.just buy the crossbow.Your partner will eventually start rapidly shooting when she "masters" her gun, something I could have done with my mastery of squeezing a stress ball,or greasing the trigger a bit.Oh yeah and  forgot to mention that you and your love interest are Furies,one orange and one blue,this trying to take the model of the show "Gumball" on Cartoon Network.How I know this is before gaming, I usually submit to a premeditative state using whatever I actually WANT to see on the T.V,or to put it in a way that doesn't make me sound like a pretentious douche, I watch T.V,and I sometimes find myself watching either Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network,and everything else would be Comedy Central or reruns of That 70's show.

And so yeah,he want's to make some iconic characters using something allready pretty well known,and that's all right.One game that I hold to the highest amount of respect in the Castle Defense scene is Bunny Invasion:easter Invasion,a game I play every Easter.The game is basically this but pulled off 10 times better,so if you actually liked this game,or didn't hate it at least,then go play BI:E,because really,this game has boring and overused shooting that all the other crappy games of this genre have done better,but then again,I'm sure you could do worse.

4/10

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/574397
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/490571 

Thursday, June 9, 2011

More posts!

Now that summer has came,on all of our faces smiles spread.And yes I did that only for you to remove the comma.Anyway, I will be posting more often, and I will post even more so if I get some god damn comments.

HAPPY SUMMER

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Interesting note, in Bioshock's Andrew Ryan's name, the letters can be spelled as "We R Ayn Rand", and in case you didn't know, Ayn Rand is a big Objectivism activist. I'll include that objectivism is the belief that people of religion REALLY need to stop pestering us on what we do in our fields of science, health, and so on, and I'll excuse you for not knowing.This is interesting because Andrew Ryan is indeed an objectivist in the game, and his beliefs are clearly stated in that way, and it seems this move was indeed intentional. It is...very interesting.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Downloaded Steam!

I have figured out how to fix my computer, atleast in a way that now I can play simple or old games.I will be buying Terraria, Team Fortress 2 (PC), Killing Floor, and Amnesia when I get hold of some money, so look out for those.In the meantime, I will soon be doing the Mortal Kombat 9 review (I know I said that I would do Splinter Cell first, but I figured to just watch the story on Youtube), and I will be holding a Team Fortress 2 match tonight on Xbox 360 ( my gamertag is LeoInTopHat).Bye everyone!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Everyone break out your plasmids,and children find your daddies,because we're going to Rapture!

Sunday, May 15, 2011

New Games!

At my local gaming parlour,I noticed a certain Splinter Cell on sale for 5.99$.I got exited because I wanted to try a good stealth game,and Splinter Cell is one of the most well known (If only my computer didn't have the processor of a ham sandwich,or I could get Thief 2,Which is supposed to be one of the best),and so far I am quite impressed with my newest edition to my growing library of games.

The game is Splinter Cell: Double Agent which is a relatively old game,explaining the price,but still has the graphics of today,but really I don't care about graphics(as long as they don't physically gouge my eyes open that is),so that is simply a plus on my part.Since I just started the game,you can hope for a full review soon,but I know from experience not to judge a game till the bitter end,so for now you can enjoy looking at pictures of cats or something...OH WAIT!

How can I forget to mention the second game I got my greasy hands on?MORTAAAAAL KOMBAT!Even though I am enjoying the fatalities now though,keep in mind that this Review will take longer.Why?because I got this one on PS3,and the thing is my friend owns that console,leaving me crippled with Xbox only games.It's o.k,I love both consoles,but I would enjoy playing Killzone,Yakuza,and the like.The Combat in the game is great and really smooth,but it wouldn't be Mortal Kombat without it,so I'm going to observe Mortal Kombat's Achilles Heel,the Story Mode,in which the devs always seem to leave mangled and broken.I'm hoping for the best,because I am a true fan of the franchise.

See you guys later...         -Leo

Friday, May 13, 2011

Online Game Review: Reimagine:The Game

Hurray!Finally I evolve from my gelatinous mass to an actual writer,and it's time for that to show.For my first online game review (console games coming soon :3 ),I review the newest entry of :The Game: series,in which I actually liked.you might have noticed that "liked" meaning you already probably know how this review is going,and I find it very sad to say that :Reimagine  is a steaming pile of excrement,in spite of the other two.If you're familiar with the series,you'll know it is a very funny pile of poo,and you can point at it with your friends and laugh your hearts out,but once you look at it closer,you'll notice it's hard and filled with bugs,giving off an absolutely disgusting smell,making you realize your wasting your time with it.Maybe I'm being a little rough on the game,but it sure as hell wasn't easy on me,so why should I be?The original game is simple,just jump off the platform,and after dieing,you'll get a piece of well written and clever humor for each level,dressing your character up as people of pop-culture,or giving a topic that you hold onto.The next Game (Replaying:The Game:),was even more clever,featuring occasional gameplay modes that were actually fun and original,which you can't say for :Reimagine. Most of the problems come from bugs,because It was either a bug,or the walls were made of jam,because if I jumped on a wall during one of the games many "creative" transitions to different directions,I slid right through them,inching my way to an actual part of stable ground.another example is if I try to grab a bird from the top of the level going down,I will fail in catching it.I was absolutely puzzled on  how to get it,and then puzzled became furious,and the I was contemplating ripping my own eyes out.but after awhile,I ended up getting it by sliding in a STRAIGHT LINE.F*ck off!and let's not forget the difficulty curb in this game,as it is at a freaking peak.What happened to jumping off a ledge?too simple for you :Reimagine?Also,crawling through it,I realized that most of the jokes were boring and unfunny.THIS WAS A COMEDY GAME!I can tell that the creator was also playing a little bit to much Portal 2,as most of the levels had inspiration from it,oh,AND HE BASED 2 LEVELS ON IT!Do a couple more of those levels,and you can officially call your game "taking Portal 2 off it's Pedestal and SUCKING IT OFF"!I'm getting the impression this game was Reimagined through a Bong.

In retrospect,if you want to play a good game,look up the last two,if you want convincing to drill a hole through your ear,try :Reimagine
SCORE: 3/10
:The Game:
REPLAYING:The Game:
Reimagine:The Game:

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

WTF?

Strange thing to see Gamestop have something like this.Apparently they have forgotten the concept that people are more fond of having shiny new games,not games stained with greasy fingers caked with layers of cheetoh  dust.I'm sure they'll fix it soon,but have a look.

Strange...

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Friday Game (9:00-11:00)

Hello Unmet acquaintances,I have a Friday game going on Xbox Live,so if you you want to play,send me your Gamertag,and we shall rejoice in nerd friendship.Just remember,don't be an ass in game,or I will consider permanently banning you from all matches.

Games being played :Team Fortress 2,And Possibly Halo 3, Both On Xbox 360.

My Gamertag: LeoInTopHat

Reward: No rewards currently :(     

Monday, May 9, 2011

First post of many

Hello everyone (although most likely no one),my name* is Leo,and I am the head of GormlessGames,a gaming blog involving most everything about gaming.I will be doing reviews,starting game sessions,and anyway I can appease my currently unexcited viewers.I will start with making a jumbled mess that will hopefully resemble a forum.Don't worry.I have feeling this blog will get better.

*alias